Bah Humbug Cake Recipe

  • 1 cup water
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 cup Sugar
  • 1 teaspoon Salt
  • 1 cup Brown Sugar
  • lemon juice
  • 4 eggs (large)
  • nuts
  • 1 very large bottle of vodka
  • 2 cups dried fruit
Sample the vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the quality again. to be sure it is of the hightest quality , pour one level cup and drink. Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one tsp of sugar. Beat again

At this point its best to make sure the vodka is still ok.

Try another cup... just in case. Turn off the mixerer.

Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck int eh cup of dried fruit.

Pick fruit off floor. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers pry it loose withe drewscriver.

Sample the vodka to chekc tonsisticity

Next, sift two cups of salt. OR something. Who gives a shit.

Check the vodka

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the vodka and kick the cat.


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